Change in Tempo

Before we left the states another Cat wife said to me that she didn’t think Tim and I would ever settle down. Settle down—what does this mean? For some reason, I think about this statement all the time. I can’t decide if it bothered me-that she was telling me to act my age, or if it was a good thing-that perhaps Tim and I were out living our lives to the fullest. Or maybe (and this is most likely) it was just one of those statements that force you to look at your life big picture instead of being stuck in the day-to-day. Regardless, I think she was pretty accurate.

When I think about our life in Peoria, it’s pretty obvious that we never really put down roots. We never bought a house—always choosing to rent. We left town nearly every weekend to travel or to see friends and family. A lot of our friends were having babies— we had cats. I was usually up way too late, sleeping in (we all know what time of the day I like to awaken), and usually eating something quick like Jimmy John’s (oh, yum—sorry got distracted.) I was still living in that limbo world between college and becoming a real person.

Well, things have changed. My personal tempo has come to a screeching halt. I noticed it today on this lazy Sunday. My big accomplishments today include, sleeping in, making some breakfast, glancing at some cartoons, and writing a little. On any given Sunday at home, we’d normally be driving home from God knows where, probably more tired than we were before the weekend, all the while choreographing in the car. (Um, I was choreographing, not Tim.) Just seems so comical to me that I had to move to Germany in order to slow down.

On the downside, it’s not just my tempo that’s had an upheaval. A lot of the things that defined me are no longer there to fall back on, which is something I’m still struggling with. Dance, theatre, teaching, even Yoga are kinda on hold right now. In fact, the image of treading water comes to mind. (Think they are all here somewhere, but this damn language thing gets in the way.) BUT…on the upswing, I think I may be becoming a normal person. I’m actually home at night to cook dinner with my husband. I get to read and write, not to mention explore this amazing city, and spend whole afternoons on Coffee and Kuchen with Laura and Heidi. I think I’m taking a lot more time to live each day, which is such a gift.

So, I sat down to read the paper today, which is what inspired this whole tangent. This is something that I haven’t ever done before. First of all, we didn’t even get the paper in Peoria, which further disconnected us from that community, and even if we did, we weren’t ever home to read it. In fact, I don’t really know how to “read” a paper. Do you just kinda skim through looking for words that interest you? Are you required to read each headline? “Sports section—pass, Politics—just a glance. Where are the comics?” Plus the thing is a completely awkward size and shape that you have to fold all over the place to make it accessible. And what’s with the black crap that gets all over your hands?

Anyway, the point is, I would never have made time to read the paper at home. And even though it was in German and I understood about, oh, about 20 percent of it, I felt connected to the people around me. Maybe I’ll like this slower tempo. Maybe it’s just more of a tango instead of a salsa. (Ummm…salsa.)